Got out early from the hospital again. :)
I finally have time to write a decent post.
At the hospital, today, they made me eat.
1 bowl of milk with corn flakes (200 cals)
1 teaspoon honey (50 cals)
1 bowl of potato soup (200 cals)
Lettuce salda with lemon juice (30 cals)
1 piece of cheese (150 cals)
Total = 630 -700 cals
Okay so at least i'm not going over 1000 cals.
A lot has happened that i haven't told you about.
First.
Finally got things fixed with Lu. She was mad cause she says i don't trust her. Blah blah, i explained and well we're all happy now.
Second.
I told my parents about me dropping my two years of marketing/advertising, so i can study biology. They took it, okay. They told me they are not happy with my sudden decision but all they want is for me to be happy. I still feel like shit cause i know all the money they've "invested" in me through this two years, money they are really needing now. :( So i feel like crap.
Thrid.
I went to UC college, it's the college i want to study in. I've made the first exam. I get the results next tuesday. I'm nervous, but STOKED.
Fourth.
I'm sad. Mom and dad don't get along well. They try, but you notice they don't. They are together but they are so distant. & it sucks. It sucks. IT SUCKS. We used to be a happy family, mom and dad used to be such a sweet couple. They even took cooking classes together. They were happy. & i know dad is sad, i see it in his eyes. & it hurts me so much to see him like that. My dad is one of a kind. He is so amazing. If you could meet him. I swear you'd love him. He's a good man. Mom, mom is kinda special. She had a had childhood, my grandpa used to be a bitter man, so my mom never really knew the love of a dad. But i love her still. She's the one who taught the love for animals, she's hard to get along with sometimes. But she's done her best to change and be a good mom, and i love her for that. It hurts me to see them like that. I don't them to feel pain, i want them to be happy. I wish they knew how amazing they are.
Fifth.
My bf from college told me i was thin. Didn't believe her of course.
Sixth.
Apparently guys fancy me. (not all, duh) Yeah. I don't know why. But first Joe, but he's just an ass so he doesn't matter. Now Dan, i think i told you about him. He's sort of friends with joe. Well last week we hung out and he's a lot of fun, he is ugly. Yeah i said it. He is, but somehow i find him very attractive. Then, when i went to UC college, well Lu sand Dan studie there. So i hung with me while i was waiting for them to call me to go make the test. Lu introduced me to a few friends of her and she told i created a bit of a fuzz there. They were all, Ohh who is she? Does she have a boyfriend? She's so cute. Lu help us there, oh oh. And Dan was all LEAVE HER ALONE SHE IS MINE. Lol.
It's so stupid, but i just love the attention.
----
Gosh, dad just came home and as i've told you. He loves cooking. He says he's making banana cake. Oh daddy, why do you do this to me? I'll stay away from it. I'm not even hungry anymore. YAY. It's so awesome, girls i swear i haven't felt hunger pains in a while now. I haven't been having dinner. & i don't get hungry. :)
Okay, gotta go to college. Don't wanna get you bored with all my rambling.
Love you my loves. So much.
Stay strong.
9 comments:
bah, you know we never get bored of your rambling :):)
It's so wonderful to hear you happy about your appetite :)
And about your parents, that's sad, you poor thing. I didn't get along with my dad as I grew up, in fact I ended up moving out to live with a friend when I was sixteen or seventeen (I'm only eighteen now ha) because of it. It was horrible.
Your mum's done well to be so loving after having a bitter childhood, I know it can change you forever.
Don't worry too much though about your parents; everyone has issues and stumbles, not just us :). They'll work through it slowly, just be there for both of them :)
Congratulations with college, have such an amazing time!
Sorry for the long post, oops.
xxx
Love you!
don't be too hard on yourself dear. and ooo boy attention!! soak it up! haha <3
I'm glad to hear things are fixed with Lu! & you finally told your folks about your decision- I know they just want you to be happy, try not to feel bad, this really was the best decision. Stay away from the cake! You can do it! xxx
Yay! So glad you had a successful day, and I'm glad you parents took the news well! I'm sorry your parents aren't getting along too well, I know exactly how that is.
Stay superstrong! <3
You're doing so great!
-Molly
i'm glad you fixed things up with lu! and sorry about your parents...maybe it's just a rough patch? i hope they rekindle their happiness.
and i know what you mean about attention - it's so good sometimes :)
stay strong xx
So glad about your intake hun, and about all the good things like your course and you starting to pull ;P but I'm sorry about the parents thing :/ we love you! stay strong xxx
2. It's good that you got out of that course now rather than later in order to do something you really like. I almost applied to do Maths or Physics but had to really think about what I would enjoy doing and what I'm actually good at. Yeah, I find Maths and Physics interesting but I don't love them like I love Music.
5. I get that from my friends and family occasionally but I've learned not to argue against them and just say "thanks" even though inside I'm screaming: "I am NOT thin! How can you think that?"
3. GOOD LUCK! Hope you get good results! :) x
700 cals is pretty good : ) and all of that seems pretty healthy.
I'm glad you guys worked things out. Fighting with friends is never fun.
That's cool that your parent's aren't too upset about you changing your focus and don't feel too bad about money wasted, continuing in something you aren't interested in would be a much bigger waste and now you know what you do want to do.
It sucks about your parents : ( I'm sorry
haha of course you love the attention, it shows all your work is paying off : )
<3
I'm sorry about the family life :( Just keep in mind that everyone is their own person. We only have the ability to change ourselves, but you can always try to be a good example or give positive affirmations. Good luck with school, and the boys :) Why do they fancy you? Because you are probably a cutie
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